Inside: With people dictating how your life should be, life can be exhausting and you’ll get burned out. A paradigm shift is what you need; until you embrace how messy and imperfect your life is, you won’t live a happy and satisfying life.

The noisiness of this world can’t be expressed. People flaunting on social media, TV shows describing an ideal love life, the lousiness of having fancy cars, houses, and luxury, and the endless lectures to get a degree, hustle, work hard, build, compete, strive, and yearn for the most of life. Sacrifice rest and sleep for the result, Strive for recognition, Make huge impacts, Make your life count, you won’t matter if you don’t.

But trying to do all these, and follow the rules leaves me burned out, tired, stressed, and disheartened. I can’t keep up with this pattern, does this make me worthless?

Can’t I just be the unpopular love and light giver? Away from the crowd, but people in my circle, my readers, my supporters, my friends, my family, and colleagues know they are treasured and I’ll choose them over and again.

Rather than have a foundation, an NGO to support people, can’t I keep being the simple advocate for Albinism and Vitiligo, teaching them to embrace themselves and giving meaning to their lives?

What if I don’t want to be known by thousands of people? But I consistently give out beautiful content, affect lives without being seen, care about people without having to be publicly praised, and take baby steps that’ll give me peace and satisfaction. Because big isn’t always what matters in the end, what matters at the end is that you reflect on your life and be glad for every step you made and the decisions you took.

Life Is Messy

When I was younger, I fantasized about what my life will look like now based on the animes, cartoons, and movies I saw, the pictures I was exposed to, and the people around me. All I patiently waited for was for the day to bring to reality these fantasies, To finally be a doctor(because that was like the best occupation then) I waited to meet my fairy Godmother like Cinderella, to meet my prince charming and live happily ever after. Like Mickey mouse, I wished the world had a way of solving my problems without bothering so much about it. Like Star Wars characters, I wished I was a superhero, unlimited, and completely unstoppable. Like in Hollywood, I wanted to fall in love at first sight and live happily forever. Guess what? All these never happened. Even more terrible things happened but I showed up anyway.

I couldn’t prevent myself from having allergies that result in attacks that sometimes are life-threatening. I couldn’t stop myself from having a rough childhood, bullied, abused, and broken. I couldn’t stop my Trevors from happening. I couldn’t protect myself from an anxiety disorder, and fretting over the slightest things. I couldn’t protect my heart from getting heartbroken countless times, I couldn’t change or stop events from taking place. But do you know what I can do?

I can forgive myself, embrace my life, love myself, understand my life, and make meaning. I realized that I can’t please everybody and in the end, nobody cares about you as they do about your results. Life is messy no matter how you try painting it, and that’s a fact. I learned to embrace my life, as messy, broken, imperfect, as it was and I started a process, self-awareness, healing, forgiveness, and discovered that I MATTER! More than I can fathom, I am important and life is worth living. I don’t have to hinder the true expression of me and you do too YOU MATTER!

What’s The Way Forward?

You don’t have it all figured out,

You’re imperfect,

Well, that’s perfect.

Praize Achom

You do not have to live in judgment anymore – comparing yourself to others or trying to keep up or measure up, to live someone else’s standard or life, or change for anything or anybody. Your life is as beautiful as you make it. Choose to embrace your life just the way it is, get a journal, embark on that journey of discovery. Away from TV shows, away from the media, away from toxicity and negativity, express you, do you! Only when you do this, will you truly experience happiness and fulfillment.

Countless times, I’ve been asked how I stay positive and have everything figured out. My answers never changed; I don’t try to be perfect, I grow at my pace so I don’t have to prove anything. Although people will always have hurtful things to say but my opinions matters even more than theirs.

I trust that this little insight into my life blessed and inspired you to be yourself. Quit trying to be liked by people, be effective for you. Let me know your thoughts in the comment section.



Add yours

  1. Thanks for this post. I’m very good at comparing myself with others, dwelling on issues and beating up myself for the wrongs I do. Guess my perfection is in my imperfection.

    Liked by 1 person

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